This year I’m turning twenty-six. I’m kinda struggling with it because that’s the age my parents were when I got sick and my mom was pregnant my younger sister, Anna. Obviously my parents’ life experiences aren’t the same as mine. I still can’t help but think, “What if…?” What if I never had gotten sick when I was three? I have gone through this countless times because I know if I ask, “What if…?” it will then turn into my saying, “If I didn’t have dystonia I would….” … as though I can predict what I would have accomplished in my non-handicap life.
Anyway, there’s nothing I can do or say to change what has happened. But in December, when I was thinking about turning twenty-six, I was reading in Psalm 136 and it was like getting a hug from the Lord. While I’m crying in His embrace, He comforts me gently saying, “Oh, Abigail, give thanks unto the Lord; for he is good: for his mercy endureth for ever.” Psalm 136:1. And in the next 25 verses the phrase “for His mercy endureth forever” is repeated in every verse. This was very interesting to me and I thought, “Well, I must need to remember that phrase during whatever season I’m in!”
Even though I just had celebrated Thanksgiving, I needed to be reminded once again to give thanks because He has blessed me throughout the years. 🙋🏻♀️ I forget, just like you forget, to be thankful for the life God has graciously given us. It happens, but we need to recognize that it is happening and actually acknowledge the problem and fix it. I know—trust me, I know—it isn’t always easy to acknowledge and fix that shattered, confused spirit that wants to ask all the questions. I have been there, my friend. For me I struggle with it inwardly and really don’t talk about it much. I can dwell on those unanswered questions every day and cry about it for hours. And I have done just that several times through the years. In those times I think about Heaven and getting a heavenly body! I listen to songs about heaven and those encourage me to press toward the mark, because His mercy endureth forever.
How are you doing so far this year? Do you need a reminder to be grateful for what you have?
Please listen to this song called, We Will Remember. I hope it will be a blessing to you.
This is a painting I painted with an inspiring quote from my heroine Joni Eareckson Tada! It says, “Sometimes God allows what He hates to accomplish what He loves.”